Monday, April 4, 2011

All...or...Nothing?

I had an epiphany today.  I pride myself on my intelligence and so I feel a bit foolish in admitting that it took me this long to realize something so basic.

Ever since Holly and I realized that we have to stop seeing each other, I have thought about it as an "either/or" proposition.  As if it were all or nothing for me (and for us).  But I finally realized that even if this is the end - even if I never see Holly again, if we can't have it all, I will sooooooo not be left with "nothing".  I realized that I have the love of an amazing woman.  She truly is like no one else I've ever known.  I'm going to hold onto that and I hope she'll do the same and that that knowledge can help sustain her through what looks to be dark times looming ahead.  I will try to do the same.

Holly is lots of things to me and with me: Beautiful, vulnerable, passionate yet...reserved, smart, open-minded, forgiving, understanding, supportive, funny and really, really sexy.  She has given me so much and helped me in many ways.  I like to think I'm a better person for having known her.  Even if we can't have all we want, we have SO much more than nothing.

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